Sometimes people cheat simply because the opportunity presents itself, and that is how one reader has tried to justify his actions. Working as a lorry driver who travels across the country, he spends many nights away from home, which ultimately led to an extended affair with a woman working at a regular delivery destination. Now married with a young son, he finds himself with a pregnant mistress and is seriously contemplating a total disappearing act to leave his problems in the rear-view mirror.
The root of the dilemma
The reader explains that he is in his early thirties and constantly on the move for work. About a year ago, his wife discovered explicit messages on his phone, leading to a confrontation where she kicked him out. She eventually took him back after he promised the affair was over, but the other woman persisted, drawing him right back into her bed. When the mistress became pregnant, he hoped she would choose a termination, but she refused. Having previously read stories about people blocking their partners and vanishing without a trace, he has considered doing the exact same thing to escape, though his regular work trips to her workplace make that difficult. Despite still loving his wife and son, he feels utterly overwhelmed and useless.
The brutal professional advice
Relationship expert Laura Collins offers no sympathy for the reader's self-inflicted plight, stating that her heart goes out to the two women involved rather than him. Suggesting that his mistress should have an abortion just so he can disappear is described as utterly appalling. She notes that failing to use protection during sex naturally carries consequences, and any decision regarding a termination must belong entirely to the woman. If she chooses to keep the child, the driver must provide financial support while making it clear he has no intention of being a long-term partner. Collins urges him to finally take responsibility by being completely honest with his wife, warning that he should not be surprised if she permanently closes the door on their marriage after already giving him a second chance.
